Gen X, health, randomness, silliness

this is just how I am now

I thought I was getting sick because I felt really awful the other day. The day after that I didn’t feel great, either. I didn’t have a fever so I figured it wasn’t the flu. I was pretty sure it was the cold my family had been passing around that I’d managed to avoid so far.

But the weird thing is, I never really got sick. No sneezing or coughing. No runny nose. My ears felt stopped up a little but that was it. Aside from being tired I had no impressive symptoms, but I’m always tired so that hardly counts.

That’s when I realized: this is just how I am now.

I mean, maybe it was (is?) a cold. I feel kind of like it’s a cold but I really have no data to support that. My greater point is I am now so old that I don’t know if my symptoms are due to a virus or my age. What in the actual hell is that about? Like am I just falling apart now? Every year from now on will something on my body just quit working? Like, will my third toe on my left foot just randomly become useless? Wait: I don’t really use that toe NOW… MAYBE IT’S ALREADY QUIT WORKING. I never even got the chance to tell it how much I appreciated its commitment to teamwork. Thank you, toe. RIP.

So this is getting older. You feel like crap. Your toes stop working. And that’s just life, man. We just have to accept it.

I never thought a simple (possible) cold would leave me with a useless toe.

Now that I think about it, it’s possible my foot just fell asleep because I can’t really feel any of my toes on my left foot.

So never mind. I’m fine. Carry on.

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