family, health, mindful parenting, mommy needs a vacation, organization, parenting, stay at home mom, work at home mom

How Do You Take Care of You?

No, really. I’m asking for a friend: How do you take care of you?

Do you have something special that you do just for yourself? Where do you find the time? I think most of us know what we should do to take care of ourselves but the real struggle is finding the time to fit it all in. At least I think that is how it is for me.

One of the things I do for me is write this blog and I’ve talked about how it’s helped me discover this is an area of my life I want to focus on. On the super popular blog Kelly’s Korner, she is hosting a link up on this very subject. I felt compelled to explore it even further because I’ve been exploring it in my head forEVER.

THE AGE OF BUSY-NESS

At this point in my life I almost feel like it’s a foolish goal to have “me” time. There are so many things we are responsible for as mothers, as parents. Are we supposed to cut something out or pile more on? Are we failing if we aren’t taking care of ourselves? It kind of sounds like the answer should be yes, but when you have young children and no family around to share some of the craziness, where do you find that “other” time? Everyone is critical of the over scheduling of children these days, but what about the over scheduling of parents? When did life become so complicated?

The whole idea of “me” time seems selfish to me. Yet I desperately need to have quiet downtime in order to recharge myself and be a better wife and mother — a better me. So what is the answer?

WHEN DELEGATING WON’T WORK

In an office environment, if you are struggling to get everything done you would be sent to a time-management class. In that class you would be advised to minimize your interruptions and delegate work to others when appropriate.

What if you are self employed and work from home — while your children are there? Is there a class for that? Even if there was, how would you go if you are the primary caregiver for the kiddos?

As tempting as it is, I’m pretty sure it’s frowned upon to lock yourself in your home office when you are the one responsible for taking care of your children…

THERE IS AN ANSWER 

This can’t be a new problem. Children have always been children and moms have always had things they’ve needed to accomplish. I think what is different about the issue today is that our lives aren’t as compartmentalized as they once were. You can work from your house, your car, the coffee shop. You can stop in the middle of composing an email (or a blog post) to wipe a nose or take your toddler to the potty. Multitasking has become the way to live.

Doing one thing at a time just doesn’t exist anymore. So maybe “me” time doesn’t either.

Wait – was this “me” time?

Do you share my foolish dream of time to take care of yourself? Or have you found a way to do it, even with young children? Please share your ideas, solutions, or problems in the comments. Be part of my village.

8 thoughts on “How Do You Take Care of You?”

  1. I have learned to ask for help. Sounds like such an easy thing, right? But as Moms, we feel like we should be able to do it all, and if we can’t, well then we’re failures. I found myself taking care of everyone around me, which left no time to take care of me. So I asked my husband to take over bath and bed 2 nights a week, while I go out and do whatever it is I need to do (shop, blog, nails, etc.) It’s just a few hours a night, 2x a week, but it makes a huge difference. I feed the family around 5:30, then I walk out the door. When I get home around 10, the kids are in bed, the kitchen is clean, and I go straight to bed and wake up ready to tackle it all in the morning. I think it’s best to start with something small and realistic.

    1. Heather, this is a great idea. I never thought of it like that. I do that sometimes when I have special things come up, but I think maybe I am choosing the wrong activities during that time. So when I return, I don’t feel reenergized at all. Honestly, I never thought about just taking my laptop and finding a corner at Panera for a couple hours.

      So maybe I have “me time” after all – I’m just not using it in a way that refreshes me. Thank you!

  2. Love this topic! I find that having a supportive spouse is extremely helpful; he encourages me to take time out away from the house on my own while he watches the kids. I find that shopping alone and spending time with girlfriends is re-energizing. And also, like you, getting my hair done kind of counts as “me” time 🙂

    1. You know, Amy, I swear I forgot about shopping. Crazy how when we are busy we forget the weirdest things? I am really due for a shopping-all-by-myself day. Like I mentioned to Heather (and probably on my Facebook page) I think I just need to make sure I am choosing the right activities when I have the opportunity to be myself. I need to embrace my introvert needs!

  3. I like how you talk about choosing the right activities in the comment above. I think this is a problem I face often, it maeks me re-think saying “yes” to every little thing that came along.

    Thanks for sharing and for linking up with us!

    1. Thank you, Jennifer, and the other ladies for picking this subject! I think it’s one we need to continue to talk about and examine. I’m going to keep revisiting it from time to time and will have a guest post on the subject soon.

      Thanks for reading!

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