I’m being held hostage by a small crazy person.

She won’t let me eat or even go to the bathroom. When I try to sit down, she insists I get right back up.

Torture? No. Toddler.

Ah, the toddler years. So adorable. So frustrating.

You know how looking at an adult as if he or she is a child can help you feel more compassion for him or her? It kind of works in a similar way if you do the opposite for a toddler.

As my toddler waddles through and destroys my house, barking orders in some babble like language while waving her arms, I like to think of her as an adult doing the same thing. In which case we would consider her absolutely crazy or have her arrested.

I thought it would help when she started talking and could tell me exactly what she needs. Not so much… Now she just thinks she can have or do anything she asks for. I actually wanted her to want to do things on her own, but now everything is, “Dey Dey’s work” or “Dey Dey help.” (“Dey Dey” is how she says her name.)

Or then there are the times when she is desperately trying to tell me what she wants, and I have NO idea what she is saying. So she gets frustrated. And yesterday, she debuted her new response to being frustrated: screaming. Like actual screaming. So that was pretty awesome. I just stopped whatever I was doing to see what she would do next (she cried).

Oh, I took a picture, too.

I actually adore the toddler stage. I guess I am just a glutton for punishment, but I am endlessly fascinated by watching these little people make the transition from baby to kid.

I’ve decided that part of my baby’s problem lately is she is going through a developmental growth spurt – she says several new words every day and repeats every thing we say to her. She often answers, “Yessss, Mommy,” when I ask her a question, and frequently follows up with, “Peessss?” when she is denied something. She’s been using three word sentences more and more, like when I walked into her room today and she had fourteen tissues on the floor, all wadded up around her baby dolls, and she said, “Blow nose baby.”Adorable. Truly.

So we’ve had kind of a rough couple days for whatever reason, but today I’ve been singing a little song to her that I made up (for her sister, actually, but I just change the name – don’t tell) and she’s been repeating it and singing with me, which was so sweet. Our singing of the song as I was getting her ready for bed tonight morphed into her saying – and repeating – a new three word sentence: “I. Love. YOU!”

Yeah, that’ll work. My job rocks.